Doing Nothing Alone

My phone has picked up the annoying habit of spontaneously shutting off for no reason at all and refusing to turn back on again. When this happened in the middle of my lunch break yesterday as I was making plans for later that night, I had a minor panic attack resulting in a hurried trip over to the mall to track down a Telus store that would allow me to charge it up quickly. By the time the sales associate there grasped the concept that I did not want to purchase either a new charger, a new battery, or a new phone, my poor little guy only got about three and a half minutes in the "recharge center" before I had to rip him off life support and run back to work. This meant, unfortunately, that he didn't make it, leaving me disconnected from the world for the rest of the afternoon.

Of course, my initial plan was that I would rush straight home after work to get my phone plugged in and charged up so that I could commence communication with those people who had been so rudely interrupted and subsequently ignored due to my phone's malfunctioning. But over the course of an afternoon in which I did not find myself repeatedly grasping for my phone, giving and receiving constant updates, I started to feel a little more relaxed about being disconnected.. And I had a brilliant thought. What if my day didn't revolve around texts and plans and expectations? What if I just gave my phone a little time off, and did whatever I wanted to do, all alone? The sun outside added to the appeal of this novel idea, and so I decided that I would not, in fact, sprint home the second I got off work, but instead would wander aimlessly and easily wherever I felt like going.

Me being me, I happened to have a book, a Starbucks card, and a PB&J sandwich in my purse, and that's all I really need for a date with myself. I spent the evening downtown, wandering in and out of stores, reading and tanning at a park on the water, and exploring the city I've always loved but am still getting to know. I didn't talk to anybody; I never even checked the time. And I noticed on my way home after several hours on my own that not only was I meandering at half the speed I normally walk at, but also I had been standing at an intersection for about five minutes and had never pressed the button that I usually incessantly push in my frantic hurry to get to wherever I'm going.

Alone time doing nothing (without a phone!) left me relaxed and gave me time to think through those thoughts that everyday life blocks out. It forced me to enjoy my own company and to make myself happy. It de-cluttered a brain that is often overflowing with lists and plans, allowing me to focus purely on the present moment. It was a much needed break from a hectic life that is often concerned with balancing schedules and accommodating others. Alone time doing nothing made me focus on myself, right now, which is something I rarely do, but is something that is very necessary.

But, it was able to be so positive because, even though I was alone, I never felt lonely. I knew that once my phone sputtered back to life I'd be thrown back in the midst of family and friends who, although they may keep me glued to my screen a lot of the time, they also keep my life full and happy. So, even though I enjoyed my afternoon date with myself, doing nothing alone, I think I may start carrying my phone charger in my purse. Because a date like that will need to be scheduled in next time; I don't know if I've grown enough to be able to handle another impromptu phone coma quite yet.